3 under 3

Just being human…

Posted on: November 6, 2010

I had a pretty unproductive, uninspiring, un-fun week last week, and consequently didn’t feel like writing anything open or honest about my life. I wanted someone else’s life for a change, actually! Really I was just feeling down in the dumps, and so when all of the usual things went wrong for all of the usual reasons, I put it all back on myself and started to think that I clearly wasn’t the right person for this very important job of raising three young children. Someone fire me now and I’ll go find something else to do! Something that pays!

Luckily, I’m old enough and wise enough now (ha ha) to know that I was just experiencing a temporary slump in mood, and that I would be able to find my way out of it in a few days. And I did. I’m learning to recognise that, every now and then, I let every little thing get on top of me, when normally it wouldn’t. It usually has to do with feeling like I’m not doing anything properly – I’m doing a half-arsed job of too many things and not doing any of them well. So I get into a flap and waste a lot of energy being upset about all of the things that I’m not doing, instead of just concentrating on the things I can do. In my former life (as a non-mother) I was a perfectionist – “anything worth doing is worth doing properly” was a bit of a motto. Not any more – I just don’t have time. I’m a big believer in cleaning around things, mopping between the legs of chairs instead of putting them up, pushing things aside as I vacuum, and only doing behind the couch every few months!! Near enough is good enough. But every now and then the perfectionist side of me resurfaces and I feel like I’m not achieving anything at all. So, last week, nothing got cleaned or tidied, clothes weren’t washed, dinners were only vaguely nutritious (and late!), and much TV was watched by the kids while I ‘flapped’!

Anyway, I’m done flapping now. Next week will be better. I will do what I can, and not worry about the rest. Today has been a good start – I’m going to pat myself on the back for spending quality time with the kids, cleaning the toilet, vacuuming and mopping the floors, and not losing my temper too badly when Molly pooed all over everything, again. And I’m going to ignore the fact that I haven’t washed any clothes in 3 days, the bathroom still smells of wee, and the kids were still in their pyjamas until 12:30 in the afternoon. Life’s good!

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