3 under 3

10 things…

Posted on: December 18, 2010

Blue Milk is one of my favourite bloggers. She writes about a diverse range of topics, but mostly to do with feminism and motherhood. I find her posts very interesting, thought-provoking, clever and often funny. I especially like the series she has written about each of her two children at different ages, called ’10 things about…’. I love her honesty in including some of her least favourite things about their behaviour, as well as her favourite things. Blue Milk makes it okay to not love everything about your child all of the time, which is healthy!

So, I hope Blue Milk doesn’t mind if I copy her idea and start my own lists…

10 things about Tiernan, aged 3 and a half (almost)



Picking mulberries


1. I love that you are so good at speaking, and expressing your ideas, however random! I love hearing what you think about things, and seeing how your mind works. Some of the things you say are so clever. I wish I had a photographic memory, because I am hopeless at writing them down.

2. I love that you are getting better at staying with me and listening to what I say when we go out. Not perfect, by any means, but definitely, definitely improving! A year ago, I couldn’t walk out of the front door with you unless you were wearing your giraffe harness (shock, horror!), but now you are pretty reliable.

3. I love watching you interact and play with other kids. You seem so ‘together’ and mature around other kids, and you usually try to be kind and friendly. I love that, when things go wrong, you usually manage to stand up for yourself without resorting to violence, even in retaliation. You’re even pretty good with Molly at home, but I get that it’s harder not to fight with her, especially when she starts hitting/biting/pinching/scratching you first!

4. I love that you finally, finally have stopped having ‘accidents’ all over the house, and are even wearing undies to bed now. I love your cute little bottom in your undies, too.

5. I love hearing you sing. You don’t do it very often, but you’re pretty good at it, and you usually get the words right. You are also an amazing dancer – it is so fun to watch you confidently bust a move when the moment takes you. I especially love your break dancing, which you have discovered all by yourself, clever kid!

6. I love how you remember everything! Although, sometimes it gets me into trouble. Like when you reminded me of the time I said ‘Shit!’ when we drove down a particular stretch of road, six months after the event.

7. I love that you will go and play trains in your room for up to an hour without needing any input from me. However, sometimes you do like to show me the big, long train you’ve built, or you tell me what Toby and James are up to, and it’s nice to feel included at these times. I do wish you would include your sister a bit more when she wants to join in, but I guess you’re only three.

8. I love that you still enjoy cuddles and kisses, especially right before bed (unless it’s one of ‘those’ nights when you are being horrid and crazy because you are over-tired).

9. I love that you are such a good sleeper, at night (you’ve dropped your day sleep, but you can be coaxed into having a rest anyway). I don’t even mind that you come into our bed most nights, when you do it quietly and don’t insist on sleeping on the edge, which drives me crazy. You usually go straight to sleep and then sleep right through your Daddy getting up and ready for work, as well as whatever noises the baby makes. You don’t take up too much room, and lying next to you always reminds me of how small you still are, even though you’ve grown so much.

10. I love how un-fussy you are when it comes to eating. You have always been happy to eat just about anything. You even eat your veggies first at dinner time, and you’re the only pre-schooler I’ve ever met who does this.

Now for the not so lovable…

1. Okay, I really do love that you will eat almost anything I put in front of you. What really irritates me is the way you constantly ask me for food all day long! Even if we have finished a meal together literally five minutes ago, you will say “I’m hungry, can I have something to eat?” I spend all of my time trying to figure out whether you are actually hungry, whether you have worms (we’ve done the treatments several times, so I don’t think so), whether you are bored, or whether you are just completely obsessed with food. I still haven’t figured it out. What annoys me even more is that, after a day spent with me giving you food every hour or so (against my better judgement, but at your absolute insistence), you then don’t eat your dinner! But I have to make it because you tell me you’re hungry and you really want it.

2. I love chatting to you, but you don’t seem to have any volume control attached to that voice box of yours, and I am constantly reminding to use your ‘indoor voice.’ Problem is, I don’t think you have one.

3. This is probably (hopefully) yet another three-year-old thing that you will grow out of (please God), but what have you got against getting ready? You are perfectly capable of dressing yourself, putting on your shoes and grabbing your barty (blanket) so that we can go out, but you simply refuse to do any of those things for yourself, and you also refuse to let me do them for you when we end up running so incredibly late that I have to force you. I could sort of understand it if it only happened when we were going somewhere you don’t want to go (shops, doctor’s, etc.) but when I try to take you to the park, the pool, playgroup, a friend’s house, it’s still the same. What the?

4. You have a vivid imagination, which I love when you use it to entertain yourself (and me). But when you tell Molly there are dinosaurs coming to eat her every single day (which actually isn’t very imaginative now that I think about it), purely for her reaction (which may or may not be genuine, but it’s big) then I get cranky and I wish you would go back to using your imaginative powers for good.

5. Sometimes you are incredibly rude and hurtful to me, and to people who are only trying to help you and make you happy (like your Gran, the last time we visited her). I know you don’t really mean it, but you know that what you are saying and doing isn’t nice, and you don’t care. Yes, I realise you’re only three and have the empathy of a stick, but it’s hard not to take it personally when you attack people in this way. I can handle it (to some extent) when you do it to me, but it’s very embarrassing when you do it to others as well.

6. Lately you have been quite rough with Neave. You used to be so gentle and loving towards her. You’re still very loving, actually, but while you used to gently pat and cuddle her, now you think it’s appropriate to also lie on top of her, put your feet on her, tickle her rigorously and generally rough her up a bit. It doesn’t seem to matter how many times I explain to you that all these games will be lots of fun when she’s bigger (like Molly, so go do it to her!), you just don’t listen.

7. In fact, you don’t really listen to much of what I say at all!

8. Where are your manners, boy??? Didn’t I teach you anything? Well actually, I must have because you are very polite when you want something from anyone who is not me, but I get “Mummy, I’m hungry”, “Go and get my barty”, “I want to watch TV”, “JUST DO IT, MUM!” I do remember a time, not so long ago, when you used to say please and thank you to me without prompting, so what happened?

9. I really hate the fights we have over getting into the car. Could you please just climb into your seat (“Your seat, Tiernan!”), and wait for me to buckle you in, without jumping all through the car, hiding behind the seat, climbing into the front and pressing all of the buttons, getting out of the car and running around it, and then kicking and screaming while I physically put you into your seat myself. Please???

10. I’m going to leave it there, with more “I love’s” than “I don’t love’s”.

Phew! That’s quite cathartic, actually. There’s something to be said for venting, especially when I can’t tell you any of this really, because a) you wouldn’t understand much of it, and b) it would be pretty damaging to your self esteem, probably. I will try to remember to tell you the things I really love about you (in fewer words) as often as I nag you not to do the things I don’t love.

I do love you, lots and lots,

Mummy xxx

3 Responses to "10 things…"

LOve the “empathy of a stick”, very cute expression.

Am flattered that you used this format for your own post and thank you for the lovely things you said about my blog. Very nice to meet you, over here.

Thank you Blue Milk for taking the time to read my blog. I really do love yours 🙂

[…] mentioned this before, but I love bluemilk. She has something intelligent to say about […]

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