3 under 3

An ode to polished floorboards

Posted on: September 21, 2011

Weetbix. A quick wipe, and it’s mostly gone. But sometimes, you miss some. Therein lies the danger. Because missed weetbix becomes a magnet for more weetbix to cling to. The first spot of weetbix lies there, almost invisible to the naked eye, waiting to attract more of its kind. Each day, another layer of weetbix is added to the slowly growing weetbix colony. Eventually, with enough layers, the colony becomes too large to be contained in just one spot, and so it starts to spread. Amazingly, it is still virtually undetectable. A slight stickiness may be felt underfoot occasionally, but closer inspection will not reveal its source. Another day, another layer of weetbix. Soon, the colony will have covered all of the area underneath the baby’s chair, and will start to spread beyond its boundaries, and attempt to establish a foothold beneath the dining table. At this point, the the colony is both at its strongest, and its most vulnerable. It now has the sticking power of superglue. It can attract and adhere to almost anything: chair legs, dust motes, pet fur, shoes. However, it can also now be seen – it appears as a thin layer of furry, greyish scum. Sometimes, it may even be detected by the noise it makes as it attempts to catch hold of your shoe and keep it for its own. Discovering it spread from one end of the dining room to the other can be quite devastating. Destroying the colony will be laborious and slow, as vigorous scrubbing is required to break down the strong chemical structure of the weetbix. If you have floorboards, this is achievable in an afternoon.

If you have carpet, forget about it.

3 Responses to "An ode to polished floorboards"

Ha! When we moved out of our last rental house we had it professionally cleaned but I didn’t notice until it was time for the final inspection that the cleaners had not removed the weet-bix from the floor where the high chair had been. (I also had never really noticed this till then.) I ended up standing in that spot for most of the inspection so the agent didn’t see it!

Well said Anna. As someone new to polished floorboards, I had been wondering what those sticky grey patches were…

Indeed. It’s much harder to be a fan of carpet when cleaning up the sticky, gummy bits from it is so much more intensive.

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